CareSouth carer Pam King is Scottish and her husband Shane is a Kiwi. Both grew up in rugby obsessed households, so it was inevitable that any children who came into their lives would be well-versed in the game they play in heaven.

The Kings joined CareSouth’s Aunties and Uncles program four years ago and began caring for a shy young boy named Lachie* (not his real name). Last year they asked him if he would like to play rugby. Lachie, now nine, took the ball and ran with it and has never looked back.

Lachie is one of 30 children in CareSouth’s Aunties and Uncles program, which operates in the Illawarra, Shoalhaven and Milton/Ulladulla, and was set up more than 20 years ago to support disadvantaged children by linking them with carefully selected and trained volunteer carers.

After a careful selection process the Kings were chosen to be an Aunty and Uncle to Lachie when he was five and a half years old. He began spending one weekend a month with the family and, like rugby, it proved to be a match made in heaven.

“I think with Lachie it was a perfect match for us. Aunties and Uncles has been the best thing, it has really worked for our family,” said Mrs King, who has a teenage son and daughter.

When the Kings signed up to join the Aunties and Uncles program they had no idea how life changing it would be. The Kings wanted to make a difference to a vulnerable child’s life but instead it was Lachie who changed their lives.

“Aunties and Uncles is an amazing program, not because of what we do for Lachie, but because of what Lachie does for our family,” said Mrs King.

“Lachie really looks up to both our kids as role models and it is an invaluable lesson for our own kids to have him in our lives. It is good for them to stop and think, ‘well we are so lucky’. It teaches appreciation to our kids and reminds them that they shouldn’t take anything for granted.”

Mrs King recalled the day Lachie first came into their home and marvelled at how far he has come out of his shell.

“Lachie was five-and-a-half when he first came to us and he would hardly speak,” said Mrs King. “Since then the changes we have seen in Lachie have been amazing. He is articulate, confident and loves socialising with other children.”

“We are all rugby fans but it was my husband’s idea to ask Lachie if he wanted to play. I was delighted when Shane raised it with him and Shane was so keen to support the whole thing. Lachie went along and tried it and he completely loved it. That was the turning point for him I think.

“Playing a team sport gave him confidence. Now when we get to training he just runs off with his friends. It is really good for him to be part of a team and to be socialising with other children.”

So much so that Mrs King threw a ninth birthday party for Lachie last year and invited his entire rugby team to help him celebrate.

“He really is part of our family,” said Mrs King. “I think of him as our third child. I would be devastated if he didn’t want to be a part of our family anymore. I really love him, he’s a really good wee boy.”

The flexibility of CareSouth’s Aunties and Uncles program also means the Kings can spend as much time with Lachie as they choose to, which makes getting to rugby training and matches a lot easier.

“With rugby over winter it is much easier for us to have him more than once a month,” said Mrs King.

“We have been doing this for a while now and we have a really good relationship with Lachie’s dad. We have linked up with (Lachie’s brother’s) Aunty and Uncle to try and plan our weekends so that Lachie’s dad, who is a single parent, gets some respite.”

While Lachie’s family and the Kings deserve much of the credit for his transformation Mrs King is quick to point out that an array of support networks have helped Lachie to reach his full potential.

“CareSouth take quite a while matching a child to a family, it is very carefully done,” she said. “The Aunties and Uncles coordinator is so good at matching a child with a family and you get constant support, there is always someone helping and advising. You’re not on your own.”

Aunties and Uncles Illawarra coordinator Vickie Blackwell said pressure on families, for all sorts of reasons, can impact on a child’s happiness, self-esteem, and well-being.

“An aunty or uncle who steps forward to give a vulnerable child their time, while also giving parents a break, can make the difference for a child living with disadvantage and hardship. It really does take a village to raise a child. And that’s exactly what the Kings have done for Lachie, they have a rugby club, a complete community behind him, and they work in partnership with Lachie’s dad. They are as much a support for him as they are for Lachie.”

Ms Blackwell said the success of the Aunties and Uncles program lies in its simplicity.

“Aunties and Uncles is about spending time with a little person and doing what you normally do and sharing what you love. It could be cooking together, taking the dog for a walk on the beach or simply reading together.”

Mrs King agrees wholeheartedly.

“We are really conscious of the fact that Aunties and Uncles is not about money and what you can give these kids, it’s about them spending time with your family and the enrichment that provides to everyone who is involved,” said Mrs King. “One of the things Lachie loves most is going fishing with my husband.”

And of course playing rugby, said Mrs King, recalling a recent conversation she had with Lachie.

“He said to me in the car on the way home from rugby: ‘I’d like to keep playing for another three years’. I said to him ‘why would you stop at three, you’re so good at it”. And he told me he would keep playing ‘just as long as you can keep taking me’.”

The Kings are looking forward to many more weekends on the sidelines cheering Lachie on as he continues to kick goals throughout his life. His next milestone will be graduating from the Aunties and Uncles program, a formality which will celebrate Lachie’s achievements but won’t change how he and the Kings spend time together.

“We are just going to carry on, family time as usual,” said Mrs King. 

“Aunties and Uncles may no longer be involved from a case management point of view but the relationship will very much live on, with Aunties and Uncles only a phone call away if ever needed,” said Ms Blackwell.

CareSouth Aunties and Uncles spend quality time with a child or young person on a regular basis. This flexibility allows families to simply include vulnerable children in their everyday activities. 

If you are interested in volunteering please contact 1300 554 260 or visit the CareSouth website at www.caresouth.org.au